What is a Blessing? Maybe it’s not what you think…

When was the last time you really thought about the definition of a blessing? Recently, someone shared a beautiful definition with me that I had never heard, and it made me think more about the word and its meaning.

This woman, I’ll call her Annie, shared that when she went through her divorce (more than 20 years ago!) she stumbled on an article where several people of faith were asked to define a blessing.

The answers varied, but a rabbi offered one she vividly recalls and still finds relevant:

“A blessing is whatever gets you to the next place.”

I had to stop and think about why that definition struck me as different from others I’ve heard, so I did a little research.

According to the dictionary, a blessing is “God’s favor and protection.”

Other options are a prayer, a wish, or a spiritual gift bestowed upon us, not just by someone of faith, but by anyone. Or, we think of the phrase, “count our blessings,” as in, all the gifts we’re thankful for in our lives: people, relationships, health, financial well-being, and more. That phrase can be used to help people reframe something difficult. Yes, this obstacle or painful event may have shocked or saddened you, but focusing on your blessings will help you find strength and gratitude (this one certainly works in divorce).

I particularly love that the definition above reminds us that blessings are often disguised and may not even be recognized for what they truly are until much later in life. At the time a future blessing shows up, we might not have the perspective to think of it as something other than a terrible and destructive force.

But what if this big hairy monster that’s crashed its way into our lives is a Trojan Horse of sorts, stomping around and wreaking havoc until we can see it differently? Can the same event be both one of the most painful and overwhelming experiences of our life, and a blessing?

I think it can be, especially when using the definition above. When I was going through divorce, believe me, I did not see it as a blessing. But today I know it was, precisely because it got me to the next place. I am more content, healthier and stronger, and I even have a new career doing exactly what I was meant to do. I would not have started down that path without a giant shove. Sometimes, that shove is necessary even if it’s unwelcome.

What’s the lesson for you, if you’re in the thick of the mess right now, with no blessings in sight?

Take a deep breath. Focus forward. What if you choose to believe that you must not have arrived yet wherever it is you need to be?

Whatever gets you to the next place. 💪🏼 💝