What Was My Best Post-Divorce Decision? This one.

by | Jul 31, 2024

Believe it or not, we got a guinea pig first. Pretzel was adorable but wasn’t the real companion I wanted for me and the kids. Then Ozzie made his way into our lives and changed everything.

We couldn’t have a dog when I was married because my ex was too allergic to them, even those that didn’t shed. “Fish,” our allergist told him. So we put that idea away and remained pet-free. It was easier to travel, the floors remained unscratched, there was no poop to clean up, and no cushions were destroyed. I recognized the benefits of being dog-free, but after divorce it felt significant that I could choose to get a dog if I wanted to. It was so foreign to make a big decision like that alone, and it felt strange – both empowering and stressful that I could simply make this happen – there was no one to argue with, no back-and-forth, I could just make this life changing purchase anytime I wanted! I knew it had to be for me as well as the kids since they would be off to college in a couple years. Would I regret it? What could I do if I did? Did I know what I was doing? (Answer: definitely not.)

My daughter had always begged for a dog. She sought them out and they seemed to be attracted to her, too. I loved that I could give her a positive distraction during this difficult time, and I figured all of us would benefit from any opportunity to add more love into our lives. Eight years later, I’m happy to say I was right. Bringing Ozzie home ranks as one of my very favorite parenting days. I will never forget the joy that lit up my daughter’s entire being. She literally broke down in tears holding him for the first time. Interestingly, it took my son a bit longer to warm up to him, but that was okay. Sometimes best friends find each other instantly, and sometimes true friendship takes a little longer.

Ozzie and I bonded immediately and taking care of him helped me laugh, which had been missing in my life, and to focus on something not divorce related. I was grateful for the distraction and loved that because my daughter wanted to be around him, she got me, too. (They were in high school – I took whatever time I could get!🤣)

For those who can do it, here are some of the reasons I love the idea of a post-divorce dog.

  • They get you out and moving – if you’re struggling to get outside and engaging with other people, a dog is a great conversation starter and taking care of it requires that you get up and move – and that contributes to your recovery.
  • They are generous and forgiving – they love you no matter what you look like or what you’re wearing, and often have an uncanny ability to sense when you need some extra TLC. Puppy kisses are incredibly healing.
  • They teach patience and make you laugh. True, some toys, pants or furniture legs may not make it through a dog’s first year, especially if you have a puppy, but the cuteness usually outweighs the naughty behavior. Also, there are amazing dog training resources out there to minimize these issues.
  • A dog’s love fills you up in ways you probably not have imagined. Ozzie is my first dog, and now I can hardly imagine life without my four-legged child. Plus, my human children call and text often to get pictures of him, and facetime to talk with him. I like to think they’d call anyway, but I love that he gives us a happy excuse to connect.

Of course, there are challenges with being a dog parent, including travel arrangements, vet bills, and indoor accidents, among others. But ultimately, Ozzie was a source of love and strength at a time when we all needed it most and he continues to add light and levity to our lives every day. This is definitely one decision I got right.