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Divorce is A Shit Sandwich

(Because it is, right?!)

💬 I Should Do What? 😵‍💫

How to Navigate Questionable Divorce Advice from Friends & Family

If you’re dealing with divorce you’re probably hearing a lot of opinions. While loved ones mean well, their advice can sometimes feel overwhelming—or totally off-base. This week’s blog breaks it down so you can stay grounded and confident. 💪

✅ Understand their good intentions
🚧 Set clear boundaries without guilt
🔍 Consider who the advice is coming from
💖 Reconnect with your own values
🧭 Trust your instincts
👥 Seek professional guidance when needed

✨ Your divorce journey is yours—and that means the most important voice to listen to is your own.

👇 Click below to read the full post and take back your power.

Question: 

My parents have been a huge help to me during my divorce. They’ve come to stay with me and my kids, listened any time I’ve called and even helped financially. I truly can’t imagine where I’d be without them. However, they also make disparaging remarks about my ex in front of my kids, despite me asking them not to. I appreciate their help and feel conflicted asking them to stop but I’m not comfortable with what they’re saying about my kids’ other parent.

Answer: 

This is a delicate situation that many people find themselves in during divorce. You mentioned that you have asked them to stop, but it sounds like you need to do that again, perhaps differently than the first time.

Here are a few suggestions:

1. Choose a quiet time when the kids are not around and you won’t be interrupted.

2. Start by saying you have something important and maybe a bit awkward to talk with them about. Tell them it’s a tough conversation for you, and you appreciate them being there to listen.

3. Start with gratitude. Let them know how grateful you are for their support and how much of a difference it’s made for you and the kids. 

4. Make it about the kids, which it is. Make them aware of this important information that they may not have: Studies show that kids see themselves in both parents. When a parent is criticized kids see that as a criticism of themselves, too!

I doubt your parents want their grandchildren to struggle any more than necessary during this time! Give them the benefit of the doubt to try again, and remind them that one of the reasons they’re supporting you so wholeheartedly is because you’re a committed parent who’s focused on your kids’ wellbeing. Ask if they can help you give them the extra love and support they need right now without discussion about the ex, and give them a chance to try. 💪 💝

Here I’ll share some of the books, websites, podcasts and experts to help make your journey a little less shitty!

✨ New on my Website! ✨

Take the guesswork out of the most challenging divorce discussions with one or all of these helpful guides 🗒

✅ They all include scripts, templates and more so you can say what you need with love and boundaries.

And I’ve made them super affordable so you can get all the support you’re looking for! 💝

I am a corporate communications VP turned Certified Divorce Coach, and I created the Better Than Before Divorce™️  program for those early in the divorce process who want to reduce the impact of divorce on themselves and their children, minimize conflict and come out BETTER on the other side. Throughout my career I have worked to help executives, teams and individuals communicate succinctly, with clarity, intention, and impact, and I love using these skills to provide support and confidence to women and men tangled in the web of divorce.

My Better Than Before Divorce™️ clients benefit from my 25+ years of experience in crisis communications, branding and marketing, as well as my calm strength and commitment to tangible results. I am also a trained mediator, I’ve completed Colorado’s Collaborative Divorce Level I and II trainings, and I have a bachelor’s degree in psychology and an M.S. in Organizational Dynamics from the University of Pennsylvania.

I hope you found this information useful. Please share your feedback HERE anytime, and visit the rest my website, betterthanbeforedivorce.com, for more information on private coaching, or the Better Than Before Divorce™ online course.