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Divorce is A Shit Sandwich

(Because it is, right?!)

It’s easy to take other people’s actions personally, especially during hard times like divorce. But usually, their behavior has nothing to do with you — and everything to do with their own struggles. This post focuses on helping you to stop the self-blame spiral and start trusting yourself instead. 💛

🔹 In reality, most people’s behavior is about them, not you. 🌪️
🔹 Especially during divorce, it’s crucial to separate your worth from someone else’s choices. 💔 ➡️ 💪
🔹 Learning to trust yourself will help you build the life you deserve. 🌟
🔹 Ultimately, choosing yourself, vs. taking things personally, is incredibly freeing. 🚀

Question: 

During my marriage I had several different health issues, including eczema, heart palpitations and asthma and I am writing to share that they have almost all cleared since my divorce. Is this normal?!

Answer:

I am not a doctor, but we all know that our bodies do not compartmentalize when it comes to our health. You are definitely not the first person I know to have a positive physical response to leaving what I can only assume was an unhealthy situation for you. 

As you evaluate your life now and compare it to your marriage, can you reflect on the specific ways your life has improved? This will help you figure out how to keep the positive energy alive and to acknowledge any old patterns if they come up again.

Congratulations on this significant health news! Wishing you many more years of strength and wellness. 💪 💝

Here I’ll share some of the books, websites, podcasts and experts to help make your journey a little less shitty!

I was happy to join Jamie M. Lima recently on his podcast, Broke Up Not Broke(n). We discussed the importance of building the support team you need during divorce, how to tackle the financial must-do’s even when you’re feeling overwhelmed, and so much more.

Jamie is an experienced financial planner and mediator who went through his own divorce and now helps others navigate this challenging time. Here are some of the highlights of our conversation:

➡️ Start small – break the list into manageable pieces so you get some wins in your column!

➡️ Utilize the people on your team for their expertise. Your lawyer ≠ a therapist or coach!

➡️ Is there something (like gathering your financial data) that’s causing you to freeze in your tracks? Rather than focusing on everything you have to do start with one small thing and give it 15-30 minutes. 

You’re stronger than you think, and there are experienced and supportive professionals available to help! 💪 💝

I am a corporate communications VP turned Certified Divorce Coach, and I created the Better Than Before Divorce™️  program for those early in the divorce process who want to reduce the impact of divorce on themselves and their children, minimize conflict and come out BETTER on the other side. Throughout my career I have worked to help executives, teams and individuals communicate succinctly, with clarity, intention, and impact, and I love using these skills to provide support and confidence to women and men tangled in the web of divorce.

My Better Than Before Divorce™️ clients benefit from my 25+ years of experience in crisis communications, branding and marketing, as well as my calm strength and commitment to tangible results. I am also a trained mediator, I’ve completed Colorado’s Collaborative Divorce Level I and II trainings, and I have a bachelor’s degree in psychology and an M.S. in Organizational Dynamics from the University of Pennsylvania.

I hope you found this information useful. Please share your feedback HERE anytime, and visit the rest my website, betterthanbeforedivorce.com, for more information on private coaching, or the Better Than Before Divorce™ online course.